Pitfalls of Growing Up

For one of my senior projects I am making a documentary film about siblings and their impact in each other's lives. For this project, I am going through old videos and photos of me and my brother growing up. It is a lot of fun going back through old photos and seeing how much you have changed. On of my favorite things is to see the imagination that I had as a child. There was one video where I had paint all over my face because I was trying to apply my make-up, and I thought I looked so pretty. It is funny how paint can easily turn into make-up, and how much I believed I was pretty.


It's funny how when we grow up, we lose that imagination. We know that paint is not make-up and that it does not go on the face. We tend to be more practical, and imagination gets pushed to the side. I had a course this past semester where we focused partly on the imagination and the power it has. If we only live in the real, we only see what is in front of us, and we can't believe in anything outside our bubble. However God works in the unseen and unbelievable, and that is where our imagination comes in. We use our imagination to see the ways that God is working in ways that not always seen. So maybe as we grow up, we should keep part of our imagination.

Dear Heavenly Father,
Thank you for the gift of the imagination. Help me to use it to further you kingdom and to see all the ways you are working in my life. Amen. 

Beautifully Broken

During one of YouTube binge streaks I was on, I found a YouTuber that I really enjoy. His name is Jon Jorgenson and he does Christian Spoken word poetry. One of my favorite videos of his is called "A Million Pieces" (Link is Below) One thing I love about this spoken word poetry is how he makes being broken a glorious event.

When we look back in our lives, we can easily name every mistake and every broken piece in our life. There are many parts of our life that we want to hide from people because we are ashamed of who we are. Yet Jon talks about how our brokenness is a reflection of God's glory. Our brokenness shows how God can use anyone to work for his glory. 

Another thing about spoken word poetry is the power behind the words that are spoken. When we speak in a church or in a lecture, the words are very even and it can be very dry. Yet the power and the rhythm causes all to pay attention to the words being said. And another part of poetry is all the metaphors that are used. Listening to the metaphors shows that I am more than i can ever be. We get so trapped up in doubting who we are as human, that thinking about us in a different way allows for other ideas of who we are can enter our head.

So as you go throughout your week, know that you are more beautiful being broken because God is still able to use you in ways you never imagine. And I encourage you to take some time on YouTube and listen to some spoken word poetry because it is a great way to gain a new view of the word.

Dear Heavenly Father,
Thank you for loving me in all my brokenness. Help me to view myself the way you view me and to see how you can use someone that is broken to a million pieces. Thank you for the people who also create art on YouTube to help us be encourage in our walk with you. 

Video: Jon Jorgenson  A Million Pieces

Sitting There Helpless

One of the biggest take away I had from the high school Bible study I attended was that when the leader was telling of how God will break our legs so that we would have to completely rely on him to carry us.  This whole discussion got started when we were debating if God would ever give us more than we can handle. Most of us have been told that he won't give you more than we can handle and our leader was against that idea of thinking. He believe that time and time again, God will give us more than we can handle.

And by the end of the meeting, I agreed with him.

Now that might sound a little intense saying that God will give us more than we can handle, but the fact is that we aren't suppose to be able to handle everything. God make us to rely on him for everything, but we walk in the belief that we can handle everything. We think we are God, but we aren't not even close.

God will give us more than we can handle to remind us that we need to rely on him. Last semester I was the editor of the short film, and for a week straight I work as hard as I could, thinking I could get the whole project done, by myself. The day of the premier came and five in the morning I had the realization that I couldn't get it done. I could not get the video exported in time, and it was my fault if we didn't have anything to show. I broke down in tears, and sat in the fetal position mad at myself for what I couldn't do. I sat on the floor helpless and just cried. Than I was reminded of what my leader said, and realized that I had tried to do this all myself, and not once did I rely on him. I couldn't do it by myself  for I need God.

After I turned to God, he helped me clear my head and figure out what was wrong, and we ended up having something to show that night. It was stressful, but God had to give me more than I can handle just to remind me to turn back to him for all that I am to do. It is never easy when we find ourselves completely broken, but it shows us just how much we need God and how great it is to trust the guy who is in control of everything.

Dear Heavenly Father
Thank you for always being with us, hearing our every need and every tear we shed. Help us to turn the focus off what we can do, and place it on what you can do. You are so much greater than anything that may come up in life, and I trust you and your plan. Amen. 

God's Painting

This past Wednesday was the super blue moon and the lunar eclipse. I was one of the crazy people who was up at 4:30 am to watch the blue moon and then stayed up for the lunar eclipse. I looked at the blue moon, and at the time when I looked it was blocked by clouds, but that didn't mean that the sky still wasn't pretty.




The blue moon created interesting patterns in the sky, and the clouds had this eerie blue effect on them. After a while I went back to my room, and I laid on my couch and just looked out of our big glass window. Even though I couldn't see the moon, it could still appreciate the blue in the clouds in contrast to the yellow of the buildings under the street lamps. It was a beautiful mix of warm and cool colors, and just looking out the window. Everything looked so peacveful, and at the moment everything was okay.




It is amazing on how God can paint the sky to where it is absolutely beautiful, and how it is so much more beautiful than anything we can ever make. God is such a master painter, and he can take anything that is simple and make it beautiful. He can make something that is so ordinary, and make it shine bright and beautiful. It is a great reminder that no matter how ordinary, we may seem, we are worth so much to God, and he can make something beautiful out of all of us.


Dear Heavenly Father
Thank you for the beautiful nights. Thank you for the lovely scenery that we can see, and thank you for continuously working on me to make me more and more beautiful each day.

God's Plan Is So Much Better Than Mine

So two years ago I was registering for classes and I really wanted to take this linguistic class in the upcoming semester. It was really the only place it fit in my schedule and it seemed like the perfect opportunity to get credits out of the way. However, I couldn't fit it into my schedule because it overlapped with a different course that I also need to take. I was freaking out because things weren't going they way I wanted them to, or the way I thought.

I kept trying to fit the class into my schedule, and it never really fit anywhere until this semester. This semester I was finally able to take the class. After signing up, I realized that this was the best semester that I could have taken the class, and God kept saying wait, until it was the appropriate time to take the class.

The biggest reason this is the right time is that i am taking the class with one of my roommates. It is fun in class, and we can share textbooks and help each other with the homework. It is lots of fun taking this class with her, especially because it is not always the most exciting subject.

When we wait on what God has planned for us, things work out for the better. And sure it can be hard and frustrating during the process of waiting, but it is worth it in the end.

Dear Heavenly Father,
Thank you for knowing what is best for us and not letting ourselves get caught up in the things we think is best. Please give me the strength to sit and wait patiently while you work things to my advantage. Amen. 

A Million Dreams

Over the break I saw the Greatest Showman with my family and I think that was the best movie that came out in December. The editing to the cinematography to the story, especially the story, was phenomenal. I remember sitting in the theater when the song, "A Million Dreams" came on and I sat there in awe of what was going on in the song as well as what was on the screen. I was like something was awoken with in me that had laid doormat for a long time.


That I went to bed, but I couldn't fall asleep because a million dreams were running through my head. A flood gate of all the crazy ideas that I had suppressed came flooding over me and I chased everyone of them all night long. It was a very freeing experience and it made me stop to think of why I had even suppressed them in the first place.


Than reality set in, dreams that are worth chasing are not easily achieved. It is easy to get discouraged right out of the gate with the task in front of you, and instead of facing it, we run away from it. We shut off our dreams so that we can stay safe, and stay where we know.


However, we serve a God that is full of creativity, and he has given each one of us some of that creativity and that comes out in the dreams that we have that we want to pursue. God doesn't want us to suppress the dreams we have for what is safe, for that does not allow a chance for us to grow. When we commit ourselves wholly to him and allow him to work through our dreams to shape us to his glory.


With this I am taking one of my crazy dreams and I am going to work this semester to make this a reality. The big idea is I am going to take the songs from The Greatest Showman and make a video for each song that shows the multiple talents at Dordt. It is a great idea in my head, but to make it a reality I need to assemble a team to help me plan and a team to help me shoot, as well as find actors to be in the videos, and then I have to edit them all together. It is a daunting task, but I am going to try and make this one a reality. I may fail, but at least I would have learned what not to do for the next time. I will keep you all posted on updates through this entire process because it will get interesting and stressful.


Dear Heavenly Father,
Thank you for the creativity that you have given each of us. Help us to find our confidence in you as we dream up all these grand ideas of what we would like to accomplish. I pray for this project that I am about to start, for I pray that you place the right people in my life to help me reach this goal and that it turns out to be a fantastic product. Amen.

God of the Unexcpected

This Christmas season, one of the themes of the Christmas service at my church was that God is a God of the unexpected and how these traits are found in the Christmas story.

Now most Christians know and accept the Christmas story because we have heard it over and over again. However when the birth of Jesus did happen, it was very unexpected for the people of Israel. When they thought of the Messiah to come, they thought it would be a mighty king, one that would lead them to war to reclaim their land, yet the Messiah came in the form of a baby. That was unexpected for them. They couldn't believe that he would come in a form of a baby, for to them that was totally unexpected.

The thing is God didn't stop then doing the unexpected. Everyday he is doing the unexpected in our lives. The thing is we often don't see it as the unexpected blessing God has for us, but we see it as a hardship, or a curse, or another obstacle we have to overcome. Mary was not expecting to have the messiah, and it came at a bad time for her because she wasn't married and still a virgin, and if word got out, then she would be publicly disgraced. However this unexpected pregnancy was a blessing to her and to the entire world.

So when things turn out the way that you don't expect, do dismiss it as being bad, but wait and see what blessing God can bring you through this unexpected turn in your life.

Dear Heavenly Father,
Thank you for all the blessing you give me, the ones I expect and the ones that come out of nowhere. Help me to change my attitude when the unexpected falls on my life, for it may be a blessing in disguise. Amen.